Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
