so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
