Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
The feeling are messing with the penis
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
