i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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