My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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