Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
