You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
