apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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