this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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