You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
