THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
