we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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