How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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