People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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