the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
