She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
