I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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