on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize