i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
