beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I did not marry a roomba.
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