What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Randomize
