I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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