I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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