I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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