I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize