I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
