I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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