White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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