Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
