if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
