We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
this is an emotional support booty call
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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