Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Randomize
