Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
