...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize