So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
