Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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