Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
