does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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