just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
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