I only kidnapped one of them. chill
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
