omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
MIDGETS
????
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
