In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
