What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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