he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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