I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize