Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I just had sex on a roof
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Randomize
