Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
