i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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