so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
