Tell her she can't have a vagina
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Send help, water and tortillas.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
