I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
